when autism goes undetected

Shantha is 80. She was brought up in a remote village in South India. Her education was till her 5th grade. She wasn't particularly interested or inclined toward any subject or vocation and was not required to do so by anybody. She was married off at 14 to a man of 24. She moved to her husband's home, travelled along with him. She gave birth to her first child at 15. The baby died after a few months of its birth. Shantha was devastated but it wasn't apparent in any of her actions. Life went on as usual for Shantha. She gave birth to 3 children after that.

Her home life was passive. She did not actively participate in any family activity or discussion and even if she did, her opinions were always ignored. She always was the last to be asked for an opinion on any household matter or decision and she prefered it that way. She knew nothing of the world. She cooked, cleaned, went to the neighbours house to watch television or listen to the radio. She was indifferent towards all the happenings around her.

Her children grew up to be successful in their professions. Her husband died when she was 45. She lived with her son. She bonded with her grandchildren a tad more than she did with her own children. She would be happy so long as she could stick to her routine. She would do the same chores meticulously, daily. Any deviation from routine would upset her existence.

People got along well with her, because she was meek but otherwise thought her to be self-centered, slow and distant. Any thought of attributing this and her other peculiarities to autism was conveniently ignored by those around her. And besides, who cared about the whims of an old lady. People tended to suffer from dementia or some mental illness in their old age. There was nothing abnormal about that.

But Shantha's liefe really wasn't ordinary. She was autistic. Her autistic condition went undetected. No one bothered to accept her condition now as it made no sense to them. They didn't relate to her anyway. Just as they probably wouldn't relate to any other senior citizen. They failed to notice her innate musical talent. She had learnt Carnatic music watching 'Kutcheri' performances in local temples in her childhood. She picked up the ragas sung like they were chocolate cookies thrown to a hungry child.

Her life remains miserable and she isn't able to express it. Eighty years of her entire life just went by, unnoticed.